قصيد...لحبيبٍ بعيد

سوف لن أبكي و انا أحكي ما سيأتي عن ما كان...

فأنا الآنَ أفضلُ مِن ما كُنتُ عليهِ بعد ما كان...

كانت دُموعي تنزِفُ في طريقي لأيِّ مكان...

تليها ضحكةٌ هستيريةٌ متذكراً لمزاحك بكل مكان...

و أبكي الآن لرحيلك و لم أكن انا بالمكان...

مسافراً للعملِ؛ ما كان ذلكَ بالحسبان...

الآن تسيلُ دُموعي عند زيارتِك في ذاكَ المَكان...

رحلَ قلبيَ و عقليَ لا يُصدقُّ ما تُشاهدهُ العَينان...

فهي ترى قِطعةَ رُخامٍ فوق حوضِ رِمالٍ تَحملُ اسمكَ...

كما أحمِلَه أنا الآن...

و هو مازالَ على أملِ أن تعودَ يوماً من سفرِك...

ناكرٌ بأنه سفرٍ الى الابد...فَسُحقاً لِذاك الزمان...

زمان اليوم المشؤوم عندما استيقظتُ للعمل باكراً...

لأجد تلك الرسالة من كائناً ما كان...

معزياً لي بما كان...

فاتصلتُ بأخي سائلاً إن كان ما كان قد كان...

فَأصبحت نارَ قلبيَ بركان...

عذراً ابي...

كتبت هذا إحتفاءً بيوم ميلادك منذ أيام...

و لم يَجِد الفَرَحَ في فَراغَِ فِراقِكَ بِقَلبي مكان...

فَكانَ ما كان...

مازلت لا استطيع ان اترحم عليك الى الآن...

فذلك اعترافٌ من عقلبي بأن الذي كان كان...

انا مُبَرمَجٌ على أنّ من غاب دائماً يعود...

و انت أول قريب لي جداً...

ي

م

و

ت

فإن عُدتَ الآن حالاً من سفرك...

لن امانع حتىّ أن أرِثَ عنك أنفك...

لا اعلمُ الغيبَ لكن...

أتمنى انّكَ الآن تَضْحك...

في ذاك المكان...

مسافرٌ قلبي الآن...

بشار ⁦❤️⁩ عبداللطيف البعنون؛

الفاتحة على أرواح المؤمنين و المؤمنات

I will not cry while I am telling the upcoming about what happened...

I am better now than how I was after what happened...

When I used to bleed tears while I am walking or driving to anywhere...

Followed by a hysterical laugh remembering your jokes everywhere...

And now I cry because you left and I wasn't there...

Traveling for work and that was not taken into account and it was not fair...

Now my tears flows when I visit you in that place...

My heart is gone and my brain can not process what my eyes are seeing...

It sees a piece of marble on a pool of sand with your name on it...

The way I am carrying your name with me now everywhere...

While my brain is still hoping that one day you will return from a traveling trip...

Denying that it's a trip for eternity...

Damn it time...

That time when I woke up early for work that day...

To find that message sent by an anonymous number...

Giving me their condolences for what happened...

So I called my brother to make sure if what I thought happened happened...

That is when the fire in my heart turned to a volcano...

Sorry Dad...

I started writing this to celebrate your birthday which was few days ago...

But happiness couldn't fill the void you left in my heart...

Then what happened happened...

I can not say RIP until now...

Because that means my brain and heart are admitting that what happened actually happened...

I am programmed on; who leaves will always one day return...

And you are my first very close relative to...

D

I

E

If you return now from your traveling trip...

I wouldn't even mind to inherit your nose...

I don't know the unknown but...

I wish that you are now laughing...

In that place...

Where my heart is now traveling

Bashar ❤️ Abdullatif;

Tribute to Steve Irwin

Tribute to Steve Irwin
Originally uploaded by radiant guy.

Few days ago I watched his little daughter speech on TV, she break my heart. Everybody was crying...His wife was totally shocked even few days after the memorial ceremony :(

Stairs to heaven

Stairs to heaven
Originally uploaded by radiant guy.

She always said "Tell others about your problems/pain so they don't envy you for a perfect life that you don't really have" .

Yesterday 8th of July 2006, my grandmother passed away (my mother's mother), just four weeks after my uncle's death; my mother found out late night and she was crying until today, my brother and I were staying with her for a while, until it's was 3 AM so I went to bed because I had to wake up early for work but I didn't sleep, I was rolling over in bed until morning then I fall a sleep like there is no tomorrow and I skipped work.
My grandmother been through a lot, her husband (unfortunately the law call him my grandfather) used to hit her and to humiliate her but she didn't care because of her children; when they became older she walked away. And later he got married again to a "SLUT" who treated my late uncle (passed away 4 weeks ago when he was 45 years old only) and my youngest aunt very bad.
May their souls rest in peace, probably they already meet each others, he is her only son; they didn't see each others since late 1980s.

Photo is dedicated to my grandmother Zahrah (Arabic for "A flower") 19XX - 2006, my uncle, my friend's mother and all our beloved decedents.

Is that really you?!

DOWNLOAD the MP3 at 192 KBPS (4shared host)
Song name: Hatha Ent?! (Is that really you?!)
Singer: Thekra (May she rest in peace)
Lyrics by: Turki Bin Abdulrahman
Composed by: Tariq Mohammed (romuers says that writer and composer are one person but since he is a prince he uses a nick name as a composer)
Translated by: RADIANT GUY (ME)

Is that really you?!
I didn't recognize you!
It's the first time I see you through my eyes…I used to see you through my heart!

It's the first time my hands doesn't shake, while you are sitting beside me!

It's the first time I feel that I am not flying, while I am with you!

It's the first time I notice that you are way smaller than the great "sky dome" of my dreams!

It's the first time I notice that you are just a typical human being not an angel!

It's the first time I notice that I lost my whole lifetime with you!

Is that really you?
I can't believe it!

Is that really you?!
Is that really you?!